Adoption is definetely weighing heavily on the heart. WHY? I know this isn't something we can do realistically right now...it is so expensive, and we do not have the money for something like this...our children are so young and we have so many bills...what about time off, time for bonding, time for travel...BUT...I KNOW this is something that I feel called to, something that is deep in my heart...so what is it that I REALLY KNOW and what am I going to do about it? (If this seems confusing to you...imagine what it's like in MY head!!!) I can tell you ONE thing I KNOW without a DOUBT. GOD AND ONLY GOD KNOWS.
So I ask myself..."Who are YOU to be questioning what God has put on your heart? Who are you to doubt the timing of anything that God calls you to?" I am but a mere human who is trying desperately to do things right. No, I'm nowhere near where I am striving to be - "CHRIST-LIKE", but the effort is there...so what am I going to do about these emotions and this love for adoption on the forefront of my heart, my soul, my mind?
SO now I ask "WHAT" and "WHY?"
These are the questions of the hour! I've been catching up on reading some blogs and I decided to do some research! I learned that in 2009, only 4 adoptions were completed from Honduras to the United States. In 2008, there were 11 and in 2007 there were 22. Can you believe that??
Of course I feel pulled to Honduras, because I have been called there to serve and do missions. I pray that the opportunities to do this never cease! (A whole different topic to be discussed in a future blog, I'm sure!) BUT, as you can see from the numbers...this isn't a common place for international adoptions. So I am left to pray, to listen, and to study...God will show me when He is ready. God will lead me when it is time. I pray that I am strong enough to hear Him and to Follow Him NO MATTER where He leads me.
Our pastor has been preaching a series titled "ASKING BIG"! It is about how we pray to God, and what we should be praying for. Some questions that we have been asked are:
1. What are you going to spend the rest of your life doing? (your plan?, God's plan?, Are you sure that your plan IS God's plan?)
2. We have been urged to "GET DEEP with GOD!"
3. Are you doing what you were created to do?
4. Are you asking about the BIG things in life?
Luke 11:9-10 say, "So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened."
So....ASK, SEEK, KNOCK, REPEAT!!!!
I know that there is MUCH rambling taking place here, so in conclusion...I am praying and I am going to be ASKING BIG!!!!!